It is with great sadness that we have to share that one of our beloved Deerhorn Dogs passed away yesterday. What makes me even sadder is that most kids didn’t even know Katniss exists, let alone be able to meet her and play with her. But she was a very special dog, so I want to share the story of Katniss, as Bozeman, Patrick, Ryder, Rowan, and I mourn her loss. We adopted her in 2015 from a shelter in Tennessee. We already had two dogs, Rio and Rooster, and I don’t even know why I was on Petfinder that day I saw her picture. We didn’t need a third dog. But there she was. I drove from Wisconsin through a March snowstorm to go get her. She was incredibly fearful and had clearly not been socialized around people. On the way home, she got off the leash in a state park and I chased her for an hour before I was finally able to catch her. We brought her home and in the coming weeks she spent most of her time under our bed. But while we weren’t able to pet her much in those first few weeks, she immediately latched on to Rio and Rooster, but especially Rooster. He was her rock and if she wasn’t under the bed, she was right by his side. That first summer at camp, she spent a lot of time under the lodge. She loved all the dogs and spent time playing with them, but as soon as most kids tried to come pet her, she immediately retreated to the safety of the lodge. The only exception to this was 9 year-old Emmett Nomellini. We called him the Katniss Whisperer, because from the very beginning, he could just walk right up to her and pet her, lying in the sunshine, both of them content to just be together. We never understood what it was about Emmett, but sometimes love defies understanding.
As the years went on at camp, we kept trying to have her continue to be a Deerhorn Dog. But as time went on, she became more fearful and spent more time under the lodge. At the end of the day, it became next to impossible to even get her out from under the lodge, up the hill, and into our house. We would Hansel & Gretel treats up the hill and into our doorway, but she was smart and knew how far she could stick her head in to get a treat but not so far that we could shut the door on her. There were nights she wouldn’t come out and slept under the lodge, barking at noises and waking people up. Eventually we just had to admit that she just couldn’t handle being a Deerhorn Dog full time, so she just lived at our house in the summer, and we would take her on leashed walks. It’s always made me sad, because in our house she was different. She loved our kids and loved when they brought friends home. She loved kids, just not in large doses. Ryder and Rowan were her favorites of any of us. She would walk around the house in the morning and whine, as if asking where her kids were and why they weren’t up yet. She would get a wild streak and want to be chased and played with by them. If we just could have adopted her a little earlier in her life, she would have been an amazing Deerhorn Dog. But those first 4 or 5 months were just too formative for her to ever fully let go of the fear. But what Katniss taught me the most was how to love someone for who they are, not who you want them to be. I spent years desperately wanting her to be a Deerhorn Dog. But when I let go of that expectation, I could fully love her for the wonderful dog she actually was instead of who I wanted her to be.
Kids were the least scary, then women, then men were at the top of the fear pyramid. However, she held a soft spot for a few. If they were visiting for dinner, she was right there under the table, waiting for food to drop. And outside of the four of us, Uncle Don and Uncle Blaine were her favorites. She loved Skatie and Iz and Stamkos and she somehow knew they were not scary because they were dog people too. She also loved going on a walk to greet the horses in the morning. Of all the people she was scared of, those giant beasts never fazed her in the slightest.
The way to Katniss’s heart has always been through her stomach, and I’m not ashamed to say we spoiled her. Popcorn was her very favorite and she would come running when she heard the popper. She developed a love of watermelon in recent years as well. But nothing brought her greater joy than the crock pot. Whenever I would make roast beef in the crockpot, she knew she got cleaning privileges. We gave Bozeman a little in his bowl, but he knew that the crockpot itself was Katniss’s. She would spend over an hour licking that thing clean, and when she eventually came up panting for air, we liked to joke that she was “drunk on roast beef.” That smile was pure absolute joy.
I really wish everyone else at camp had gotten to experience Katniss. She was the best dog, and her quirky furry self dug her way deep into our hearts. She was so lost when her best friend, Rooster, died in 2018, and it makes us really happy to think of them finally reunited again. It took her awhile to accept Bozeman that fall, but he eventually wore her down, and they became the best of friends as well. All of you know how deeply loved the Deerhorn Dogs are, and those of you who have loved a dog know how keenly we feel the loss. But we wouldn’t trade the love for anything. We miss you, Kiki.
“I wanted her to see that the only life worth living is a life full of love; that loss is always part of the equation; that love and loss conjoined are the best opportunity we ever get to live fully, to be our strongest, our most compassionate, our most graceful selves.
After all, aren’t we all just trying to learn the same things here, about sharing the food bowl with our sisters and brothers, trying to keep crumbs out of the dog bed, remembering to bring the squeaky toys inside in case of rain?”
-Dante, Sight Hound by Pam Houston